So, here goes...
I talk about my job a lot because often times that is the only place I've been besides my bed for three weeks at a time. Most of the time though, my job makes for pretty good stories. This particular story is the one of my favorite phone call ever. As I've mentioned, I run a restaurant delivery service. One of those restaurants that we deliver for is a "high end" west coast pizza joint in one of the larger Atlanta area malls. That being said, I answered a call from a woman who asked if we deliver for this restaurant. I tell her yes and ask her if she would like to place an order. She says yes and I enter her address, which seems very familiar to me. I ask her what the name of the business is that she's calling from and she tells me she is in the mall. From here, I will be quoting. "So, you want to order from (insert name of west coast pizza joint here)?" "Yeuh gurl, I'm too lazy to walk over there." "Ok, you do understand that we charge a fee to use the service which doesn't include the tip for the driver and we quote 45 minutes to an hour delivery times, right?" "Look gurl, whass yo name again?" "Lisa" "Look, Liser, Imma fat gurl. I could get my fat ass off this stool, walk out da sto and spit on (insert west coast pizza joint) but I'm too lazy for dat shit." Meanwhile, I'm laughing my ass off to the point where I can barely respond. "I would be more than happy to deliver to you" "Gwon an tell that driver to get his ass on ova here and bring me some pizza." "No problem, just so you know, we have a $20 food minimum for lunch." "Ok, lemme go over here an ask dis other fat gurl she want somthin." She doesn't put the phone down and yells at the top of her voice, "FAT GURL, YOU WANT SOMTHIN DELIVERED FROM ____!!" The other woman responds, loud enough for me to hear her clearly, "What kinda stupid question is that? Of COURSE I want somethin delivered from ____!!" "Yup, bring us fat lazy gurls some pizza" So, I take her order, charge her the fee, place the order, and send the driver to the restaurant. After seeing the delivery address, he asks me if I'm sure I have the address right. I tell him yes and briefly relay the conversation I just had. So he drives to the restaurant, picks up the food, runs literally up the stairs and drops off the food. They paid in cash and tipped the driver very generously. Moral of the story? I have no idea but it was hilarious and it made my day. I giggled all day long and the two fat gurls became my favorite customer EVER.
